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Chelsea Handler has had enough of “horny old men” like Robert De Niro and Al Pacino.
In a video shared Wednesday on social media, the comedian cheekily cautioned Americans about aging actors and other famous men “who won’t stop spreading their seed.”
Along with 79-year-old De Niro and 83-year-old Pacino — both of whom have welcomed new babies in recent months — Handler took aim at 65-year-old Alec Baldwin and 51-year-old Elon Musk, saying they’ve “never met a broken condom they didn’t like.”
“There’s a new epidemic sweeping the country,” she declared in the video. “And no, it’s not another virus. It’s worse: horny old men who won’t stop spreading their seed.”
Handler then emphasized just how many offspring the four have produced altogether, with De Niro having seven children, Baldwin eight, Musk 10, and Pacino a relatively modest four.
“So how do we protect the women of the world from horny old men?” Handler asked.
“Don’t worry, I have a plan to stop this madness. And I am offering to put myself up for auction for any available octogenarians. You can find me on eBay or DoorDash — and for 20% off, you can use the code ‘sugar tits,’” she continued. “Actually, maybe all these old men should put themselves up for auction. After all, they are antiques.”
Though Musk is not yet in his 80s — or in his 90s like media mogul Rupert Murdoch, a father of six — “because of his personality, he may as well be,” Handler joked in the video.
Her comments may have been largely satirical, but Handler has genuine beef with the Twitter owner, once describing Musk as “repugnant.”
“I would consider leaving Twitter if he remains in charge,” she said on “The View” in January. “He’s a mess. … Doesn’t he want to go to Mars or something? Why doesn’t he just go?”
Handler said on the talk show that she wished Twitter would go back to being a “nice” place, perhaps nodding to the reported rise in hate speech on the platform since Musk took charge last year.
Handler also recently delivered a pro-vasectomy PSA amid political threats to birth control access, and she shaded then-Fox News host Tucker Carlson for melting down about Handler not having any children.
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